Tuesday, September 29, 2009

How the Teenage mind works aka, Lethal Cripple (AD)


So this is an excerpt from a conversation I had with my friend, who I will call Peach for now
Alabaster Disaster

I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOUR YEARS TO BE 18!

6:34pm Peach

theres no stopping you now!!

except maybe a bus.

6:35pm Alabaster Disaster

FUCK THE BUS HE CANT CLIMB STAIRS

6:36pm Peach

hahahahahaha

6:36pm Alabaster Disaster

little do we know the bus is a huge guy in a wheel chair with a gun

I also just posted this on Face Book
If you mix Mac and Cheese with V8 it taste like Spagettios, if you mix Mac and Cheese with paste sauce it taste like lasagna, if you mix Mac and Cheese with Salsa it taste like queso dip, THE POWER LIES IN TOMATO BASED PRODUCTS!

You are welcome for the advice

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Quickly now (AD)


yes Brew2 is now an official member of Brew and Alabaster Disaster, so if a random post is dropped on ya, she helped spawn it, I were very inebriated when I showed her how to use the blog and the music player account, in fact I am sure she added a couple of songs that I cant remember, well I remember one was by MSI, and she had a great deal to say about consumerism, as I shouted "DIY or Die!" in the back ground
I suppose she will be the Enigma of the site, so I will disclose very little info to secure her obscurity, she is more into Anime none of that Kuwaii shit, more like Trigun , being responsible (more responsible than me), dressing like a rad ass Goth mixed with David Tenant, she loves Dr.Who, Dexter, House, anything Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry related her favorite band is MSI
any ways enjoy the weekend
stay classy
internet

Friday, September 25, 2009

A Brew but not Brew (Brew2)


(Above: Corporate prize toy in the vending machine in the bowling alley of consumerism.)

I am Brews counterpart, equally as Brew-y but not identically Brew-y, and AD said I could do a guest blog.

Here it is.

The topic is the congolmarate known as HOT TOPIC.

WHAT THE FUCK. THIS STORE IS IN EVERY MALL, FILLED WITH TEENS AND CRAPPY MUSIC, AND THE WALLS ARE PAINTED BLACK. How does one shop properly when the environment makes you feel like a shopper to your left or right might slip you the date rape drug? The same goes out for those meccas of teen consumerism known as "HOLLISTERS." How the hell do I know if I want this tank top, which says "Hollister" on it, if it is too dark to even tell what color the fucking thing is?

Oh, you think, HOLLISTER and HOT TOPIC are very different, you think, I would never step into a Hollister, you say. Well, maybe you should. Maybe then you would understand the overwhelming influence of advertising and marketing. See, it dosn't matter if you can see the tank top: what matters is that you're hanging out in a teen mecca, that others might see you there looking cool, and when you get back to your pointless high school class on Monday wearing your new tank, others will know where you've been. If you want to barf now, wait: SHOPPING AT HOT TOPIC IS EXACTLY THE SAME! Only you can kind of tell if you've shopped at Hot Topic, since you're probably wearing a Slipknot tee shirt and a collar with some spikes in it. Then you get sent to the principal because you've got a "weapon" on your person.

What I am trying to say is that you can't win, wherever you shop. UNLESS YOU SHOP somewhere where consumerism has no reach: thrift stores! Ebay! Nobody knows you're shopping there. The government dosn't know. Advertising gurus and marketing blitzers aren't crunching your "dollars spent" and trying to figure out how to make you want to spend MORE there.

Remain less than a blip on the corporate radar! Keep the money in your pockets and experience the adventure of digging through crap to find treasures of fashion! Stick it to the man and let the fakers and the fucking ugly wannabe rich people shop their hearts out, prep or punk or both. You are truly the free people, the shoppers with no shame in their hearts. You make no trek to the Hot Topic or other "branding," "labeling" store that others use to define you when you enter your local shopping mecca!

AD says "DIY or DIE!" Listen and obey.

Brew 2 out.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Tattoooooh (AD)


(skulls! (Droooooooooool)
My birthday is coming up and assuming I will have the funds sufficient to get a tattoo I will, I might get Glenn who works here with exceptional skill even though he isn't mentioned on the site yet http://www.goodtimestattoo.net/ Or I could get Joe to do it but I haven't seen too much of his work aside from his girl friends tattoo (she is such a sweetie I should add!) I assume Glenn has worked with skull designs, I really want a muerto type themed tat.
Ideas:
I have asked Brew to design me a tattoo and It will be my first one, but knowing me, I will want more ink
Celtic - (does not mean douche bag) I am Irish so It would be nice to get something aside from a Clover, a cross, or a Clodagh design (everyone including my sister has a Clodagh tat) maybe a beautiful knot or something to place in a non douchy place
Sugar Skulls - I know they are so En Vougue right now but I just love em! its playful, respectful, etc and it is very me somehow, I like skulls in general
Calaca - A skeleton person like La Catrina would be tight, no clue where to get him or her though, but I do know I would have them wearing the most fancy ass outfit, that I, or an artist could ever conjure
Leopard print- The leopard print shoulder has been on my mind for a while now, but I don't think I would be able to afford it (both money and career wise) I think plain natural Leopard print (meaning not pink or blue or green) is beautiful even though others think its tacky, I think I will just pass this idea up for now.
Paw print or something animal related- I respect animals I really do, I have always gotten along with them and they give love right back, I somehow want to put that in tat form, not sure how yet, I dont want it to look to garish or anything.
maybe something to do with music and movies, I love film and studying it
regarless of what I get, it will have to mean alot and it will be there forever and ever and ever, So I will think long and hard (heh heh I am immature)

Monday, September 21, 2009

Que sera sera (AD)


today was very decent, I ate Guacamole, I sent my penpal a letter with a Friendship bracelet and some sugar skull clippings inside, I had a delicious Veggie burger at Frost, and Folts gave a hair cut out in public at Borders, oh fun. well I noticed some kids shooting up Heroin, and that just made me roll my eyes, and I realized that the Heroin user smoked the same brand as me so I kept the rest of my pack hidden, My B day is Oct 11th gang! I will be 18 finally for the love of god fuck yes yeeeeeah, WOO
i want
Stamps
a record player
a certain leather jacket from GoodWill that I tried to hide on the rack
a cake
white T.U.K creepers
uhhhh thats all I can think of
have a good day!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Wed till you are dead (AD)


I am tired for the first time this year, me and Brew went to Safeway and bought cupcakes and doughnuts, that is what we had for dinner, no lie, In fact this lady in front of us in line had cupons and took her time, I was making loud rude comments, but she really was being ridiculous, We made friends with the woman behind us named Kathy, she looked like a mom or something, she was nice, ANYWAYSSSSSS, I am going to a wedding on Thursday for my Uncle Chris and his girlfriend Laura, she is nice, blonde, thin, and listens to indie, stuff like Broken Social Scene and The Shins, she has been pregnant for a couple of months and so I suppose thats what jump started the knot tying, She has 2 kids from a previous marriage, one is like 11 and one is like 8 I can't remember but they are cute, FUNNY THING IS almost every single marriage in my family is because the chick gets pregnant first (Fuckin Catholics) When I save up enough money I am either getting an IUD or a Hysterectimy because I DO NOT WANNA BAYBAY, and marriage is eh to me any how, Since this wedding is so last minute I know there wont be a big fancy reception at a hotel or anything where the bartender reluctantly loads me up with long island iceteas and champagne, and where I wear very high heels that make my feet bleed for hours just because they look pretty. THERE BETTA BE SOME BOOZE, wait.....she is pregnant, why would there be booze? oh fuck >:(
oh well I am a booze hound and should be shot, My eyes are getting heavy.....later alligators.
ps two new songs
Zombie By The Trucks
Scared By Albert Hammond JR

Sunday, September 13, 2009

One of the most time consuming sites ever (AD)


http://juliasegal.tumblr.com/
Love It, Find almost all my favorite random pics there, I want to thank Julia Segal for being so damn Rad.

Nina Hagen, I am going to be you when I grow up (AD)



There is this German chick named Nina Hagen, (One of her songs is on my playlist already)who was very vury pop-u-lar in I am guessing the 80s, She is a bit of this and that starting off more pop, then got involved with the politics of life surrounding the Berlin wall, She I suppose then got more punk or something and traveled abroad more I am terrible at summurizing Ms. nina Hagen because I have gone hagen crazy and have done nothing but google her and youtube her for the last 24 hours so just look her up, but I think she is so rad, she is everything I want to be when I get older
This is a song called "You have forgotton the colorfilm" from when she was younger and with a band called Automobil (the song is about her being upset at her boyfriend Michael or "Misha" because he forgot the color film so all their vacation photos are in Black and White)

This song is called "undeniably woman" or "All Woman" about how she is pregnant and dosn't want to have the baby and she is taking pills or something like that, I want to do a cover of it in english

Friday, September 11, 2009

CHRIST ON A CROSS!!! (AD)

He is saying "yo Dawg I can't do you any harm in any way because I don't even have venom glands, but I am creepy as shit"
Christ on a cross is what I yelled when A huge ass Daddy Long Leg walked across my keyboard as I was typing 5 minutes ago, I jumped up and took a couple of steps back, then I realized that 2 more Daddy Long Legs were by my feet, Now let me clarify by saying, I am a vegetarian, I love animals and animal rights and all that BS but bugs ARE FUCKING DISGUSTING!!! I hate all bugs, the only exceptions are Butterflys, Ladybugs, Bumble Bees (did you know you can pet a bumble bee? dude you can, one time there was this furry little bumble bee sleeping in a flower and it woke up and was like "yo whats up? look how cute I am!" and I petted (is that a word? do I use the word pat?) his little fuzzy butt) , pretty moths, and some times grasshoppers, crickets, and praying mantises, because the last three are OK until they hop near me. anyways the 2 were at my feet, I ran upstairs grabbed a can of lysol and armed myself, the big one was still on the keyboard so I picked up the video game Splinter Cell (its OK I don't play it often) and smashed old big ass till he was twitching and dead. I then turned around where the other two DLLs were and I said "GO TELL THE OTHER SPIDERS WHAT YOU JUST SAW" and sure enough they scrambled out of sight, since I gave my warning I went back to my post at the computer, then they crawled towards me again so I grabbed the lysol and sprayed them till they stopped twitching (did you know lysol kills silver fish right on contact? it does) and then after I killed 3 spiders I googled them, turns out they are all harmless and it made me feel kind of bad, I can still smell the lysol, it smells like guilt and shame. I went on this site BTW http://spiders.ucr.edu/daddylonglegs.html ,oh well at least I was safe and not sorry (I'm an asshole basically) (and don't judge me it was self defense)

Getting closer (AD)


Platinum hair is hard to achieve but if you do it right it will be worth it, because then the color will look good and your hair can still be some what healthy
PS. I hate Garfield, yes the cat, I fucking hate him, why does he hate Mondays so much? its not like he works, Hes a god damned cat!
PSS My wrist are swollen because a storm is coming, its what some sailors call a "trick knee" but instead of a knee its my wrist, years of carrying groceries and carrying heavy books have finally paid off......NOT

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Lifes a Bitch and then you cry (AD)

(I am trying to get my hair to look like this, no lie)
basically still unemployed, I am going to try and see if The Hampton Inn need another person to clean rooms, it sounds so easy, make the beds, clean toilets, and you don't have to deal with people to their face!!! That is a plus seeing as how at my last job some dude actually called me a bitch because his smoothie wasn't ready in under 2 minutes (it takes 5 to make a Tropical Smoothie Cafe smoothie FYI unless its a Jetty Punch those are really easy: water, sugar, banana, strawberry, ice)
Going to put some more bleach on my hair tomorrow, and I got two more Manic Panic colors Wildfire http://www.manicpanic.com/best%20hair%20color/wildfire.html (bright almost pinkish red) and electric lizard http://www.manicpanic.com/best%20hair%20color/electriclizard.html (bright ass kelly green) both of them glow under blacklight, for some reason that makes me happy. I really want more dark greens and richer reds.

Monday, September 7, 2009

The hair fuckler strikes again! (AD)


once again i abused my bleach rights, ooh platinum underside of my bangs sounds cool, I used a v 20 developer and of course it wasn't strong enough to turn my black hair blonde it decided to turn it David bowie orange, I think my friend with her license is going to fix it tomorrow I don't know but It is definitely scaring the shit out of me.

Furries? bleeeegh! (AD)


Yeah I found out that there's this thing where people like to dress up like animals and get it on with each other, and it goes beyond that, they will actually act like animals in their every day lives and masturbate to cartoons of animals who are super imposed to look humanish, I just don't get it, WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! isn't that technically bestiality? who the fuck is going around saying this shit is okay? SIIIIIGH this is what happens when your kid is socially inept and watches WAAAAAY too many cartoons I suppose

Friday, September 4, 2009

Never ever nerver neverino (AD)

I would either react the same way, or join the parade
I love this picture and always will
REMEMBER KIDS IN THE HALL?!!
I just need to make sure I have this Clash and Bo Diddly picture before I die
This quote makes sense
I...love this.
Rollins
Indie movie funeral (fucking rad)
Murray quotes
Chase and Belushi

more random shit because my life is too boring to blog about

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I dont feel special anymore (AD)

(the girls cool back patch was a kin to this)
But thats okay, that means I am growing up
I need to wake the fuck up and get a real job and actually do whit with my life, so on I go, good luck me!
today I saw the coolest girl in the mall, working at Spencers, I complemented her back patch and made her high five me then continued to wander the store with a mask on my face and a a thong over my jeans, dont you love attention? I do.